Name: Jorrrrrn (John is also OK)
Class: Priest of Gary Gygax
Ability Scores (Rounded up to nearest 100)
Hacking, Sleeping, Tacos, Karate, Friendship
Iron Gut - Jorrrrrn is immune to food poisoning and can eat at any restaurant in Indianapolis
Blissfully Ignorant - All rolled critical failures are treated as critical successes
Air Mattress, Backpack, Credit Card (x2), Boots of Ass-Kickery +5, Earplugs (in case you snore)
Jorrrrrn was never the lucky sort. If you ask around in any tavern, most NPC's know him as "That Guy Who Lost the Housing Lottery Every Year Ever". But he's always made up for the DM's unfair bias through sheer tenacity... Utilizing a mix of rules-lawyering and politics and incredibly low standards of living, he usually manages to find a place to sleep somewhere within walking distance of the convention center.
This year, he's hitting the RPG scene pretty hard, because he finally remembered to buy event tickets before mid-July. Lots of Shadowrun, a dash of Cthulu, a little bit of True Dungeon and a bunch of other oddities mixed in. If you're interested in any of these things, mentioning them is a great way to convince him to become your hireling/henchman.
Jorrrrrn prefers to party up with other characters who are non-smokers. He's not much of a morning person - he usually winds down anywhere between 1-2am and strolls out of bed just in time for brunch. He's a light snorer, which might affect your sleeping plans, but you can do whatever because he owns a sturdy pair of earplugs (see Equipment).
He's agile enough that he doesn't fear sharing part of a stranger's bed, if it's available, but sexy enough that maybe you shouldn't trust yourself with that arrangement. That being said, he'll settle for whatever as long as it's walking distance to the con. Looking for W/R/F/S nights.
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**UPDATE** THIS POST IS STILL ENTERTAINING BUT NO LONGER VALID BECAUSE I WENT AND FOUND A ROOM